funny quotes de sex

FRANKIE · Guest

i just got this in an email...

"I believe that sex is one of the most beautiful, natural, wholesome
things that money can buy."
Tom Clancy

"You know "that look" women get when they want sex? Me neither."
Steve Martin

Having sex is like playing bridge. If you don't have a good partner,
you'd better have a good hand."
Woody Allen

"Bisexuality immediately doubles your chances for a date on
Saturday night."
Rodney Dangerfield

"Sex at age 90 is like trying to shoot pool with a rope."
Camille Paglia

"Sex is one of the nine reasons for reincarnation. The other eight
are unimportant."
George Burns

"Women might be able to fake orgasms. But men can fake whole
relationships."
Sharon Stone

"My girlfriend always laughs during sex ~ no matter what she's
reading."
Steve Jobs (Founder, Apple Computers)

"My mother never saw the irony in calling me a son-of-a-biatch."
Jack Nicholson

Clinton lied. A man might forget where he parks or where he lives,
but he never forgets oral sex, no matter how bad it is."
Barbara Bush (Former US First Lady, and you didn't think Barbara had a
sense of humor!

"Women complain about premenstrual syndrome, but I think of it as the
only time of the month that I can be myself."
Roseanne

"Women need a reason to have sex. Men just need a place."
Billy Crystal

"There's a new medical crisis. Doctors are reporting that many men
are having allergic reactions to latex condoms.
They say they cause severe swelling. So what's the problem?"
Dustin Hoffman

There's very little advice in men's magazines, because men think, 'I
know what I'm doing. Just show me somebody naked.'"
Jerry Seinfeld

"See, the problem is that God gives men a brain and a penis, and
only enough blood to run one at a time."
Robin Williams

Syth · Addict Joined: 13 Jan 2003 Posts: 661 City: Brentwood

Hah, a few of these are sigs' for people here too heh

"You know "that look" women get when they want sex? Me neither."
Steve Martin

thats my favorite Mr. Green

wake152 · Posted: Mar 03, 2003 10:15 pm Post subject:

ha ha those are great

Chukee_R · Posted: Mar 03, 2003 11:00 pm Post subject:

LOL! those are awesome!

nick e[V]ans · Posted: Mar 03, 2003 11:47 pm Post subject:

haha there awesome

Dees · Posted: Mar 04, 2003 6:15 am Post subject:

My man Billy Crystal

matt 4 · Posted: Mar 04, 2003 9:44 am Post subject:

Here is one from south park like 8 years ago, "sex is alot like football, you dont always score on the first try,....but when you do its worth all the hard work and practice" Chef

K.A · Soul Rider Joined: 13 Jan 2003 Posts: 252 City: Florida

haha funny stuff

Jen · Outlaw Joined: 19 Feb 2003 Posts: 169 City: McQueeney, TX

that's some funny stuff!!!

DaveBrowning · Posted: Mar 04, 2003 12:56 pm Post subject:

AAAHAHAHAHA!! Laughing

Liquid_Force · Posted: Mar 04, 2003 9:17 pm Post subject:

lol, thats awesome Cool

hmm time for bed